From Kaye Molloy Guidance Officer
Options for dealing with children’s behaviour
Many problems with children can be avoided completely if parents remember four
basic ideas:
1. Give children positive feedback when they do the right thing.
2. Encourage children to share their experiences with you.
3. Create lots of opportunities for children to be involved with interesting and
engaging activities.
4. Show a genuine interest in what they are doing.
There is a wide range of options for dealing with children’s behaviour. Here are
some general principles on dealing with misbehaviour in children. If you follow these
general ideas, many headaches over children’s behaviour can be avoided.
- Do set limits (… “speak politely without swearing”; “ride only up to the sign
then come back”; FIRST you need to….THEN you will do your preferred
activity). - Do praise your child for behaving appropriately (…”that’s good setting the
table”; “thank you for helping”). - Do respond to misbehaviour immediately, consistently and decisively.
- Do respond to misbehaviour by describing what the child has done wrong
(…”you ran over Johnny’s leg with your bike”). - Do respond to misbehaviour by telling the child what would have been more
acceptable (….”next time use your words to tell your sister that she hurt you.
Pushing her is off limits.”) - Do back up your instructions or reasonable requests by using natural or
logical consequences, quiet time or time out (… “you didn’t put the rubbish
out like I asked, you will miss out on 5 mins TV”). - Do remain calm when speaking to a child who is upset or who has
misbehaved. - Do speak calmly but firmly to your child when she misbehaves.
- Do act quickly.
- Do deal with the problem yourself rather than threatening with someone
else’s action. - Do try to prevent problems by ensuring that your child has plenty of
interesting and engaging things to do. - Do discuss rules with your child and give child a chance to be involved in
deciding on family rules. - Do expect reasonable behaviour from your child, not perfection.
(from Every Parent - A positive approach to children’s behaviour by Matthew Sanders).